Thursday, May 14, 2009

Paging Dr. Deetz

I spent a considerable amount of time today talking to, texting, and e-mailing home study person, mysterious home study supervisor lady, and the agency. Word on the street has it that our home study "draft" is being re-sent to the agency because of some wording concerning the acceptable/unacceptable health conditions of our adoptive child. It is our understanding that every child in a Russian orphanage has a diagnosis. We have been brainwashed since the beginning of this plight that "Sarah and Chad wish to adopt a child as healthy as possible, but are willing to adopt a child with minor or correctable health issues" To me this statement encompasses a gamut of health diagnosis that are 1-minor, 2-correctable, 3-cosmetic. Right? This rules out down syndrome, heart conditions, muscular dystrophy, the biggies. This leaves, WELL, the minor stuff. Stuff you can treat with creams, antibiotics, and worst case scenario- physical therapy, other types or therapy, and minor surgery. According to our social worker, the agency would like a list of what minor conditions are acceptable. (Cleft palate, cleft lip, heart problems- Are you thinking what I'm thinking- since when is a heart problem minor???) Anyway.... I am so tired. I am just tired. I said no. We won't be making a list. The risk in this is that we may be put on ice in Moscow trying to leave the country with a child that has scabies. Whatever. At this point, that is a risk I am willing to take. It is my understanding that some families have been denied travel home because their home study does not have a role call listed of all the fungus, bacteria, facial imperfections, and/or moles/warts/growths/viruses that a child may have. These families are being "held" in Moscow while their home study is being "revised" to include said fungus, bacteria, facial imperfections, and/or moles/warts/growths/viruses. This costs time and a lot of money. The thing is I wouldn't even know where to start on making a list. I am not a doctor. I just play one on t.v. If this is an issue, why doesn't the agency provide a checklist of medical conditions and have us check them off? And provide us with said list....say...uhhhh 8 weeks ago?
This is where I am. It's been eight weeks since our home study. I am tired. I'm not making a list. I don't have enough medical expertise to make a list. AND I am honestly scared (maybe with a little bit of shallow mixed in) to say "I will except a child with crossed lazy eyes, clubbed foot, and a cleft palate" I hope that doesn't make me sound like a bad person. I just think that medical issues should be evaluated by a doctor once a referral has been made. Then we'll take it one step at a time about what we can handle, financially and emotionally when it comes to our baby's health. Or we can just live in Moscow for a while. I just want to cross the medical issue bridge when I get to it. Dr. Deetz is taking a vacation to the Cayman Islands.


  1. NO- it does not make you a bad person. Most every 'expecting' parent prays for a healthy baby. Hello- that's why we count 10 fingers and toes in ultrasounds. You are just like the rest of us parents. We will be praying for your healthy baby.

  2. Definitely no list.....I can;t believe that they wanted you to do that.....