Tonight it was so good to be back in church for Maundy Thursday Services. I think part of my funk has been being away from our biggest support system, our church family! With Spring Break and Chad and the leadership team being gone to New Orleans, we haven't had normal church activities in almost two weeks..... I really missed being able to talk to people that I know are lifting me us up in prayer and want to know all the juicy details of the adoption. Bob said he has been reading the blog daily and was concerned for my sulking mood, he said he could tell I wasn't myself!
Then to complete the night I caught up with Chad's mom, for our usual LONG weekly conversation and then talked to my mom for our short DAILY conversation. (I think I talk to them both equally as much, just for different durations throughout the week, I'll have to start keeping track of that. It may be an interesting science experiment while we're still waiting for our stinkin' home study draft) Anyway- my parents are in route to our house! They will be here tomorrow! Yippeee! I am so excited- I can't wait to see them, I haven't seen them since Christmas I think. Wow. On Saturday we're going nursery furniture shopping, I can't wait!
Anyway, when I was talking to Donna on the phone tonight, we talked a great deal about transition, as they prepare for retirement and are getting ready to do some serious traveling; And as we prepare for this adoption journey, not just the burden of the here and now, but having a son or daughter in our lives forever! We agreed that the biggest challenge (whether it's R.V.ing cross country or jumping through bureaucratic hoops) is letting go of your routine, your life that you have a death grip on, and grabbing hold of something new, something unknown. Right now we are both juggling, trying to keep all of the balls in the air while adding in some new ones.
It reminds me of something we saw on our family cruise last September. We went to a stage show where these two amazing guys do all these stunts. One of their acts was juggling a bunch of eggs back and forth to each other and then throwing a bowling ball into the mix. Imagine the light touch needed to juggle 3 or 4 eggs (OK, I can't even image juggling 2 eggs, not much less 4 on a rocking cruise ship) AND then adding a 10-15 pound bowling ball into the rotation. Your hands would have to handle the eggs with such care and gentleness and then your muscles would really have to kick in to keep that bowling ball flying around. Adding a new element into our life is a lot like that- tossing around a bowling ball, we have to keep our routine in balance without making a mess; While at the same time, show this new heavy monster so much care and attention to keep it in flight. Check this out.... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JZ79vY-TgVs for a rough idea.
Fortunately, Chad and I rely a big God, have a loving support group of friends, and an amazing family to help us when everything around us is about to drop! And when it does drop (and it will) we have so many people to eat some scrabbled eggs with and then go to the bowling alley! We are so blessed.....